If you are single and are interested in finding the next boyfriend, girlfriend, or potential partner in your life, I would really love for you to consider online dating. I know to everyone, online dating sounds about as much fun as sitting down and matching up all of the mismatched socks in your sock drawer. I have talked to so many clients who dread online dating and I get it. However, here are 3 things that I really want you to consider that might change your mind.
Are there a large number of new people who come into your world and orbit your planet? For the majority of us who are in the workforce and out of college or a formal education, we go to the same workplace every day, and we interact with pretty much the same people there every day. We have pretty consistent neighbors and also a steady circle of friends. What all of that contributes to when it comes to dating is not a whole lot of new introductions being made. For most adults, there simply are not enough new people coming into their world for them to be able to play the numbers and find a lot of people they’d like to date. It’s really much harder than it was when we were in college and every semester we had a brand new history class full of 30 new people you could check out. It’s not that easy anymore.
The second thing I want you to consider is that algorithms and science work. There are some very clear relationship patterns that people have. There are scientific reasons why you are attracted to the people that you are attracted to. Those of you who have done any work with us at Flourish have learned a lot about your own relationship patterns. If you’re participating in one of the websites that uses the science and predictability, that can really be to your benefit. Several years ago my cousin called me and he had just gotten over a big breakup from someone that he had really loved and he had been seeing for a couple years. He decided to get online and go back into dating. He signs up for Match.com and he calls to tell me that Match told him he had a 90% compatibility rate with someone. Yay this is exciting, right? No. The website matched him up with his ex-girlfriend that he just separated from, so he felt like it was a clear, cruel twist of irony. However, he had chosen that person and he had had a significant relationship with her so there’s something to the science and the algorithms that some of these websites offer.
Finally, I want you to consider that the amount of energy that you invest into your dating life will determine how much you get out of it. If you’re someone who has been sitting around saying “I really want to date more,” “I really want to find my next partner,” or “I really want find THE one,” then you’re going to have to invest more energy, time, and effort into making that happen. Online dating is a convenient and consistent way that busy adults can make that happen.
Next week we are going to talk about healthy ways to navigate the ups and downs that come with online dating so we can get you back out there. If you want to continue receiving more tips and insights, CLICK HERE to ‘like’ us on Facebook.