Marriage counseling does not have to be stressful. It can be rather enjoyable when people involve humor while discussing serious issues. In some cases, approaching serious issues from a more casual and light-hearted way ensures that the process does not spiral into negativity. Since this is a rare tactic to take, the therapist you select is extremely important. Since we use humor in our office on a regular basis, we have observed the benefits of this tactic first-hand.
It's Okay to Laugh
Remember that it is okay to relax and laugh a little during appointments. In fact, humor can help to relieve the emotional tension and make disgusting serious issues, easier. This does not mean that we will sit around telling jokes, but that many of life's circumstances are actually funny – especially in a marriage.
For example, things that often annoy spouses about each can be slightly ridiculous, including:
- Bathroom habits
- How one uses toothpaste
- How someone is caring for a pet
- The way the laundry is done
- How dinner is prepared
While these are everyday things that are not too serious, they often lead to fights. If you have ever fought over how someone walks the dog or buttering toast a certain way, it is time to see the argument for what it was – silly. Then, you can laugh about it, rather than continuing to be worked up over something that does not impact your life in a major way.
Even events that are hard to deal with, have a humorous perspective. For example, most married couples will experience some form of financial difficulty during their marriage. Whether a job loss, unexpected bills, or health problems, things are not always going to be perfect. How you handle these situations will often dictate how well your marriage survives or thrives. If you can look at having to eat McDonald's instead of a gourmet hamburger as funny rather than devastating, you might actually enjoy laughing with each other.
Marriage counseling is a place where a couple can develop these skills and foster a positive outlook.
Letting Go Takes Time
Marriage counseling often makes it possible to let go of traumatic events or encounters, find common ground, and move to a better place. Finding common ground takes time and requires couples to avoid putting timeline expectations in place. Letting things progress naturally is the best course of action because it allows for feelings and life to change without any set expectations.
Keep an Open Mind
When visiting marriage counseling, it is important to keep an open mind, rather than coming in with set expectations. When patients come in expecting things to be difficult or upsetting, that is what tends to happen. When couples come in with an open mind, there is the possibility to experience things and conversations as they are happening; often leading to more productive results.
Schedule an Appointment
Marriage counseling can improve your life. Schedule an appointment to find out how.