Today I want to tell you about 3 different types of relationships, so you can figure out which one you might be involved in. Some of these ideas come from coach, Lisa Nichols.
The first type of relationship is what we call lifelong relationships. You know, the old-fashioned notion of being like swans who mate for life. One partner and it’s done. Now, lifelong relationships have a lot of gifts that they bring with them, but if you’re going to be successful in actually achieving a lifelong relationship you’re definitely going to need one of two things. One, really low standards so that you’re just happy with whatever you get or two, a really large toolbox so that you can address things and improve things as they come up over the decades.
Life Giving Relationships
The second type of relationships are life-giving relationships. These are those short-term romances that put a spark in your step and remind you why you’re alive. They breathe new breath into you by helping you feel attractive, lovable, fun, whatever it may be. Life-giving relationships are usually short-term – they might last up to about 2 years. They can evolve and be upgraded to become a longer and more substantial relationship however, many of them go up in flames for a variety of reasons. At the end of a life-giving relationship, there is often a significant life lesson that you can learn when you look back on it. Something to learn about yourself or the people that you’re choosing that will help you grow going forward. They have gifts, even though these relationships are not the most long-lasting.
Purpose Filled Relationships
Then, we get to purpose filled relationships. These partnerships can last for years and sometimes even for decades. They often are struck up when we are unconsciously playing a particular role in our partner’s life. Whether it is to help each other get started out in adulthood, or maybe it is to birth some kids together, to create a business, or to help each other grow. There is often a specific task that the relationship is focused around. That’s a wonderful thing but, when that task is no longer at play and when that task has been completed, that is when you really need to be on the lookout because purpose filled relationships can become incredibly vulnerable when you no longer need someone to play that role in your life. At that point in time, you either have to find a way to end the relationship hopefully with maturity and integrity, which can be really challenging to do when you’ve spent an enormous amount of time with someone. Or both partners have to be willing to upgrade the relationship and upgrade their skills to take that purpose filled relationship and transform it into a lifelong relationship.
You have all undoubtedly upgraded a phone before, you know how this concept works. When you have an older model, there are certain functions that the older model is just not able to perform the way that the upgraded model can. That’s the same way that it is with relationships.
Food for thought – what type of relationship are you in and could it be time for an upgrade?
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